fraud (weekend premiere)
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Originally uploaded by symbiopsychotaxiplasm.
this vlog took me longer than any other video I've done because of the emotionally precarious nature of it. While making it, there was a genuine discovery about myself and my insecurity as an artist in relation to the film that I went home to premiere, (which I DP'd), and its effects on my perception of interaction and lonliness in New York. ::"Sleep" by Azure Ray:: Click here to watch
posted by taxiplasm @ 4:59 PM
12 Comments:
No need to be insecure, your work is grate. I beleve you will make it.
It's the age. Throttle down.
As always.
Do I have an original thought in my head?
Am I a walking cliche?
I think as artists, these are constant questions we ask ourselves. We are at perpetual war with ourselves, but I think thats the beauty of being human. We struggle for an enduring amounts of time just to catch that one fleeting, but brief, transient moment. I believe that the greater the struggle, the greater the triumph will be.
I enjoyed this vlog, along with your other body of work. Hang in there. Your talented and your vids are very authentic. DO NOT DESPAIR BRIAN!
-Daniel
I know exactly what you mean. And you express it beautifully here.
Do you wanna know how to know if you are a fraud or not? Ask yourself this question: "am I doing the work?" if the answer is yes, then you know you are not a fraud.
These events--premieres, festivals, awards, while nice in some ways, are always jarring experiences for artists--it's not in our nature to seek approval in this way. To us the true measure of our work is in our hearts and heads and sometimes personally from our peers and loved ones. It can be strange and sometimes painful to get public adulation for our work. Making questions like "am I a fraud" inevitable. Don't let the awards fuck with your head--the work is it's own reward.
everyone's a fraud.
everyone is full of shit.
so have no worries.
Ever get that feeling that once they know the truth, you will be discovered to be a fraud? Yeah. Been there.
Are you a fraud? This is not a question to pose to anyone but to yourself. You know the answer. You know if you are a fraud or not.
You've already answered that question.
Insecurities are inevitable. You can, however, beat them down repeatedly with a blunt, heavy object until they are quite stunned. They never truly die, but they can be stunned long enough for you to realize that the work speaks for itself.
No fraud anywhere here.
Ryanne's right. I have to empty my colon.
When can I see this film of yours?
A very powerful vlog/video.
the images in this video along with commentary immediately threw me into your world...all crisp and new, as I have said before, you have talent to burn...
words fail. i am only upset at the fact that i have not been keeping up with your work and simultaneously overwhelmed at the idea of even watching another right now. the sheer...shit, everything that you inject into your work. its madness. for the sake of anything and everything that was ever beautiful, don't ever stop doing what you do. your insecurity is completely and utterly absurd to assume valid. you make me proud to be human.
-chris diaz
fine piece!
capture the moments, images are so much more telling than torrents of words.
let visual ambiguity be the serendipituous path...
best regards
sam
very few perceive themselves to be as great as they really are. some call it humility, modesty. self deprecation. cowardice. i feel that way sometimes too. am i an artist? am i a musician? am i an actress? all i know is that i am a creator. everyday i create something. but i am also a destroyer. and i have the capacity to break myself down, implode before i am fully grown. and in harboring thoughts of what i am not good at, it's as almost as if a veil is drawn and we feel like we're exposing this truth to everyone else. when really, no one knows what we are not just by looking at us. so what is the point in worrying?
almost 20. two films at sundance. incredible connections. fraud? maybe, cuz you deny your brilliance. you're pretending to be worthless when you know deep down that you are untouchable
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